Teacher: Change this sentence into Future Tense, "I killed a person" Student: The Future tense is "You will go to a jail" Teacher: Did u make this poem yourself?? Student: Yes Sir ! Teacher: Nice to meet you, William Shakespeare Teacher: Which one is more important for us, Son or Moon? Student: Ofcourse Moon Teacher: Why?? Students: The moon gives us light in night when we need it BUT the sun gives us light in day when we don't need it.. Teacher : What will you do after growing up? Student : Facebooking Teacher : No! I mean what will you Become? Student : Admin of Facebook pages Teacher : O My God! I Mean what will you Achieve when you grow up? Student : Facebook Admin Rights Teacher : Idiot! I Mean what will you do for you Parents ? Student : I create a page for them on FacebooK."I Luv Mom and Dad". Teacher : Stupid! What do you parents want from U? :@ Student : My Facebook password. Teacher : Oh God!

Physical Fitness "It's a tough job to be a student. The endless assignments and stockpiles of information. It can make you into an academic couch potato. Therefore, don't neglect a balanced lifestyle -- the active with the academic. Keep your physical self in tune. There's substantial evidence which shows that high academic performance is more likely to occur when you're physically fit. Obvious conclusion? Routinely take yourself out for a jog, or a vigorous walk, or hit some racketballs, or play basketball -- whatever you can enjoy. Make it something that cranks your internal machinery into high gear for at least twenty minutes each time. Do this no less than three times a week. Wow -- that can be an investment of only an hour a week, and it's basically free. In return, your body will thank you and your brain will be refreshed." - By Bob Gensemer  Seek Help When Needed

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water. She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and then asked, “How much do I owe you?” “You don’t owe me anything,” she replied. “Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness.” He said, “Then I thank you from my heart.” As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit. Year’s later that young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When

Memory When we first learn something, information is processed into the brain to form a neural trace. This trace first enters your sensory memory, and then, if you're paying attention, to your Short Term Memory, or STM. If you keep working to process the information and adapt it correctly it then moves to your Long Term Memory, or LTM. The information processed into your LTM is more or less permanent; with occasional reviewing you will not forget it. The trick is to adapt the information you really need into your LTM as quickly as possible. Your STM has a small capacity and a short duration; you may learn something very quickly, but in 24 hours you will lose 80% of that information. The STM is fast and easily accessed, the LTM is slower but larger. Repetition The key to learning something well is repetition; the more times you go over the material the better chance you have o

A samurai who was known for his nobility and honesty, went to visit a Zen monk to ask him for his advice. When the monk had finished his prayers, the Samurai asked, “Why do I feel so inferior? I have faced death many times, have defended those who are weak. Nevertheless, upon seeing you meditating, I felt that my life had absolutely no importance whatsoever.” “Wait. Once I have attended to all those who come to see me today, I shall answer you.” – replied the monk. The samurai spent the whole day sitting in the temple gardens, watching the people go in and out in search of advice. He saw how the monk received them all with the same patience and the same illuminated smile on his face. At nightfall, when everyone had gone, he demanded: “Now can you teach me?” The master invited him in and lead him to his room. The full moon shone in the sky, and the atmosphere was one of profound tranquility. “Do you see the moon, how beautiful it is? It will cross the entire firmament, and tom

Its Awesome.. Must Read.. A Husband comes home drunk, vomits and falls down on the floor. Wife gets him up and cleans everything. Next day when he gets up he expects her to be really angry with him. He braces for a fight, but finds a note near the table. "Honey, your favorite breakfast is ready on the table, I had to leave early to buy groceries. I'll come running back to you, my love. I love you. Surprised, he asks his son, "What happened last night?" The Son replies, "When mom got you up to bed and tried removing your boots and shirt. You were dead drunk and you said, "Hey Lady! Leave Me Alone. I'm Married!!"

A married couple in their early 60s was celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, Romantic little restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful Fairy appeared on their table. She said, ‘For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.’ The wife answered, ‘Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband.‘ The fairy waved her magic wand and – poof! – two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands. The husband thought for a moment: ‘Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again… I’m sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me..‘ The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish. So the fairy waved her magic wand and poof!.. The husband became 92 years old!!! Moral: Men should remember fairies are females too.